Here’s a little test how you can find out whether reality on screen is more real to you than what so many others call “real life”. If more than half of these statements are true, then you’re a real TV addict.
There is a lot of information out there on how to live your life: 100 places to see before you die, 100 books to read before you die, 100 things to eat before you die etc.
May I present:
10 Things a Sitcom Fan Should Do Before He Dies
1) Talk to your friends about your new love interest calling him “Mr. Big” (girls only!)
2) Try to hit on a girl/boy telling them you are a celebrity called “Lorenzo/a Van Matterhorn”
3) Order a lot of Indian Food and play Halo with your friends
4) Have a boyfriend bonfire*
5) Suit up!
6) Tell friends that you’d go on holiday while staying at a local hotel to chill out
7) Spontaneously start singing on a formal occasion
8) Keep using female names on a male pain-in-the-ass colleague
9) Get a psychiatrist
10) Get a newspaper delivered to you on the name of “Miss Chanendela Bong”
And now: 5 Things a Sitcom Fan Should Never (No Really… Never) Do!
1) Do not share food!
2) Do not let Mr. or Miss Right get on that plane to Paris!
3) Do not go to a spray tan salon and count to 10 mississippily
4) Do not go to a karaoke bar and sing “I will always love you” in the presence of Mr. or Miss Right
5) Do not say the wrong name on your wedding!
If you can think of any more things to do or not to then, share them with me in the comments!
* A boyfriend bonfire is when you celebrate lighting all the memoranda of a lost love on fire. While this is now a fairly common feature in pop culture, our respect needs to go out to Miss Jane Austen, who had her character Harriet (in Emma) burn everything that reminded her of Mr. Elton.